Sri Lanka
Sri Lanka, is a small independent island south east of India and known for its exports of tea and cinnamon. My excursion was essentially a Tuk-tuk ride around the city of Colombo. It was essentially a sensory overload with sights, smells sounds and unbelievable traffic. Add to that pythons, wild monkeys, cobra snake charmers and crowded shopping areas selling everything from spices to Sari’s and you’ve got the picture.
Colombo is also one of Asia’s busiest ports. I watched with fascination the loading of 100s of containers onto waiting cargo ships with utmost precision.
But all this pales in comparison to my bridge partner, Jane’s adventures in this wild city. She and her husband decided to get a massage to make up for the one cancelled in Thailand. She also scheduled a manicure following the massage.
At the massage parlor, they paid $50 for a 1 ½ hour massage, they went into their separate rooms and were asked to strip and rest on their stomachs. The massage progressed normally and then they were asked to turn over. There was a small towel for them to cover their private areas which they did. Both agreed the massages were excellent and Jane especially liked her foot massage. When she was almost done the masseuse indicated there were only 10 minutes left and pointed towards her feet. Jane, of course, assumed this meant there was only 10 minutes left and did she want it on her feet? she said “no” and pointed to her head, so she gave her a fabulous deep head massage.
When they returned, the Tuk-tuk driver excitedly asked if they enjoyed their massage. “Was it good? REALLY good?” Big smile and he so pleased to see that we enjoyed it. Then he said “did you get a woman-to-woman Happy Ending and wiggled his tongue”!!!!! It was only then that Jane realized the masseuse was not pointing at her FEET, but rather at her crotch!
Evidently, the towel was a signal. If you wanted a “Happy Ending” you did not cover yourself. And neither Jane nor her husband knew what a happy ending was. Her husband had covered himself but it fell off!!! He said that his masseuse asked him also & he said: “No……then I spent the last 10 minutes of the massage wondering if I should’ve accepted her offer!”
When the driver realized that neither of them had a Happy Ending he was devastated. They told him that he should have informed them so they could be prepared.
On the way to the Mall for her nail appt, Jane’s husband complained about waiting for her for an hour. Driver suggested that he drop husband off at the ship and then take her to the Mall & wait for her. On their way, driver asked (with a great big smile) if she thought it was agood idea for him to drop husband off…She agreed and then he said “OK, I will make sure you have a Happy Ending & he wiggled his tongue “
Luckily for Jane the hour nail appt dragged into over 2 hours. Now there was no time left for anything but to get to the ship before the last shuttle left the port. Whew!! Again driver was devastated that he was not going to be able to make her stay in Sri Lanka memorable with a Happy Ending. She was SO VERY relieved and curious as to where this would take place. In a Tuk-tuk He said there were hotels that rented rooms by the hour. Can you even IMAGINE what the beds were like?
The surprising thing is that both Jane and her husband had never heard the term “Happy Ending”….now almost everyone does, at least on the Viking Sky.
